Bianca's Story

Hi, I’m Bianca!

I’ve decided to stay anonymous, but here’s my story.

I was raped for the first time when I was 12 years old. This traumatic event caused me to lose my virginity.

The next time I was sexually abused was when I was 14 years old.

A 36-year-old man convinced me that he wanted to be with me and that I was special.

When I was 16 years old as I lay asleep next to my boyfriend at the time, (who would become my son’s father) at his uncle’s house, I woke up to his uncle’s fingers inside of me. I was on my period at the time, and he had removed my tampon.

At age 18 or 19 years old, I dated a 24-year-old man who was physically, emotionally and mentally abusive to me. He forced me to engage in anal sex as an apology, for him to “forgive me” for whatever I had done wrong that day.

At age 34, my dad passed away.

I lost my father. My best friend. My hero. My protector.

Nothing felt right and nothing went right after that.

I fell into an extreme depression.

I chose not to seek out therapy for healing. I thought I could heal myself.

I found out the hard way that I could not.

I was a mess. I wanted to kill myself. Often on the way to work I thought about driving into oncoming traffic. I didn’t care about anything anymore.

During that time, I made the biggest mistake of my life due to my internal brokenness.

I had physical contact with a 17-year-old male.

I was convicted of aggravated criminal sexual abuse more than 5 years older than the victim.

A part of my sentence included 90 days in county jail, and I will be a registered sex offender for the remainder of my life.

This has caused me several hardships. Although not purposely, I hurt people. I had to help people understand the reason behind my unintentional actions.

I was forced to move from my home because it was too close to a school.

I spent 3 months away from my loved ones.

It also ruined my reputation.

I have diagnosed post-traumatic stress disorder from all of this. As well as extreme social anxiety.

I am on daily anxiety medications. I go to therapy, and I attend church.

Taking care of your mental health is one of the most important things you can invest in!

If you need help, please ask for it.

Don’t let your traumas ruin your life like I did.

~Bianca

Written by: Natasha BYTS